My name is Mahmoud Ahmedinejad and I am your King. To be my follower you must renounce all other authority. To be my follower you must recant the teachings of secularists. To be my follower you must believe that I am good and all else is bad. To be my follower you must reject empirical thought, as my word is law. My word is infallible. My word is eternal and everlasting. My word is the only authority. My word is sacred. My word is to be revered as are those who speak it. Those who speak against me are heretics. Those who deny my teachings are blasphemous. Those who forgo my lessons will be killed. Those who spread my word will be rewarded. Those who die for my cause will be exalted. Those who follow my instruction unquestionably will be saved. Saved are those who follow in my footsteps. Saved are those who cover their bodies. Saved are those who drink not from false prophets. Saved are those who defend the traditions of my nation. Saved are those who pray for my divine grace. Saved are...