Morgan Freeman is god; he's merely playing an actor.
Near bankruptcy, Pepsi once offered to sell the Pepsi brand to Coke. They rejected. Oops.
I write these things because I can't think of ways to make these things into full entries.
You will spend in upwards of 30 years of your life sleeping.
Manny Ramirez and Alex Rodriguez both are ahead of Barry Bonds in home runs for their ages.
Green eyes are a mutation.
A chromosome controls whether or not you can curl your tongue lengthwise.
Annual flowers must be replanted every year, yet annual events happen every year of their own volition.
Evolutionarily, penis size is shrinking.
Apparently, making out in the backseat of a car is now a sin to the Catholic Church.
The guy that plays on The Shield is the only person who could play the Kingpin if they choose to have him appear in the Spiderman movies. Seriously, you know which guy I'm talking about.
There is trace amounts of cocaine in Coke.
Democrats sandbag failed candidates while Republicans run the same failed candidates again and again. Nixon and McCain for instance.
Want less acne? Sweat more, it clears the pores.
They say that everyone needs more fiber. Then, everyone needs more calcium. Then everyone needs more Vitamin D. Fucking hell! Can't we all live in peace?
If you think all batteries are the same... erm... realize that Energizer batteries are the longest lasting of ALL batteries. I mean, hasn't every fourth grade science fair ever proven this? The same goes for Bounty paper towels as most absorbent and strongest paper towel. What else... drinking fountains are dirtier than public toilets. Use Brita filters because our drinking water has far too much lead in it. Volcanoes are cool... well, at least the first sixteen times. Earthquake models are NOT experiments! And finally, there are FAR too many websites giving free science fair ideas, it's not rocket science, really. Well, unless it is rocket science...
What is the big problem we have with nudity? Honestly, I think we'd learn a lot about what we value in society if we all get rid of clothes for a year.
Of course conjugal visit sex is great, that way you can tell Bubba that you have a headache that night.
What is the big deal about personal space? Hey you, you've invaded my personal space! The United Kingdom of My Knuckles are going to impact the Confederation of Your Teeth if you don't apologise? C'mon.
Why doesn't Last Comic Standing get ratings? It's far better than Dancing with the Stars, America's Got Talent, and Big Brother 9(?). In the very least, it's different every night.
What's the deal with ripping telephone books in half? Seriously those things are useful. How about ripping apart a book I won't need for the rest of the year. The Bible anyone? Please? The edges are gilded and it's leatherbound, might pose an interesting challenge if you're interested.
What does the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, Santa Claus, and god have in common? That's right, they all cost way too much money to support especially if you're dating someone.
With all the men who've died in wars, general stupidity, and whatnot, there still is a basic 50-50ish split between the male and female population. Not to mention the live expectancy gap. See, men need to be promiscuous , it keeps the balance in check. Either that or women start killing themselves in greater quantities. Maybe that's why ancient tribes sacrificed virgin women. See they were on to something.
Too much salt leads to high blood pressure. Too much sugar leads to diabetes. Too much fat leads to obesity. Too much cholesterol leads to heard disease. Do you see a pattern? Only in America could one or more of these things be a factor.
The United States, Canada, Belize, South America, India, Australia, and New Zealand were all, in part or whole, English colonies. Yet, India is the only one which rejected the English language after the end of imperialism.
Why are dimes smaller than pennies and nickels?
And finally... AOL used to be the shit. Now it's just shit.
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