Rantings of a Mad Man Part XIV: Chocolate Hares and Colored Fetuses

It's that time of year again. Those infrequent Christians pack into ancient buildings to thank god for their misfortunes and the promise of a better afterlife. So I sit here now and could ramble about the idiocy of such a lifestyle or the illogicality of religious devotion in general, but I won't. Frankly, it's gotten too much publicity as it is and I have no desire to feed the beast.

That said, I will make a few observations.

Those who believe in god get to go to heaven. Isn't that like saying those who are faithful to the president get cabinet positions? I prefer a merit-based system myself, you know, where you are rewarded with a position for revolutionary thinking or a little something called skill. But by all means, an all-knowing god would certainly choose the low road. After all, whose god doesn't show favoritism nowadays anyways?

How about Noah and his magical ark? You know, the one that he fit two of each animal on? Two animals, one male and one female, of each of tens of thousands of species on earth that weren't fish or birds. Erm... He was able to find two of each animal, or did they come to him? Like, across the ocean from the Americas too? And where did all this water come from that it could cover the whole Earth? The ark didn't sink when they all got aboard? Obviously it was large enough, where did he get that amount of wood in the desert? Now that we've determined that this was impossible, how was he able to feed them and dispose of their waste for forty days and forty nights? How was he somehow able to stop them from mating, dying, and eating or killing each other? Wow, that's amazing! Certainly anyone who's ever worked with animals would be able to do that.

The Roman soldiers in The Passion of the Christ spoke Latin. Actually to be historically accurate, they should have been speaking Greek. Oh well, I guess Mel Gibson is just a bad Christian.

When the pope releases a papal bull stating something, it doesn't mean that from that point on it is doctrine. Actually, it means that from the beginning of time that has been doctrine, even if previous doctrine had said otherwise. Come again?

The books of the bible were put together by a pagan, Emperor Constantine.

Come to think of it, wouldn't the creators of the church have had to have been pagan at some point too as all religions besides Catholicism are considered pagan by the church.

The pope is considered infallible. But he denounced Galileo as a heretic for daring to suggest a heliocentric universe.

There are no non-Christian saints.

Herman Melville's Moby Dick only became popular because the pope banned it because it gave soul-like qualities to a whale.

The bible makes no mention of limbo, actually a pagan author, Dante, created it. It was then later melded into Church doctrine. However currently there is a motion underway to de-doctrinize limbo, as asked by Pope John Paul II, it has yet to been affirmed however.

If you want a picture of what the church sees the ideal Christian as read the book of Job and see if you really want to be one.

In the words of George Carlin: "The only thing a Christian desires is to die. Help them..."

Slavery was justified by the church because (particularly) the Spanish and Portuguese promised to convert them to Christianity.

I have a serious question: Where did the Easter Bunny come from?

The papacy uses the Swiss Guard for protection, yet the Swiss are only 42% Catholic. They also have a 41% Protestant population and a 4% agnostic population. Maybe they'd want to switch. How about the Conquistadors? The Spanish are devoutly Catholic after all (76%), but then again their atheist population is around 19%. Ah... life.

Up until the seventeenth century, the church did not want commoners to read the bible because it would distract them from listening to their sermons. Why?

That's all for today. Enjoy your day off from work.

FlyFreeForever.

Where Have All the Real Friends Gone?

I'm really getting sick and tired of fake people. You know at least one of those people, right? The one everyone talks about behind their back. The one that comes home from an uneventful weekend skiing and is dead set on regaling you about how he saved polar bear from certain doom, rescuing him from the path of a falling tree, all the while maintaining perfect skiing form. In addition, he was commended for his bravery in a local paper, slept with six chicks or dudes, and was offered a spot on the Olympic ski team. THAT guy. Well, you know what? Fuck that guy! We KNOW you're lying. If it weren't for the mild amusement we get from trying to figure out what you'll say next, we'd be done with you ages ago. I want to know and respect the person that you really are. Your flaws and shortcomings are part of that person. Come on people, let's get real.

Oh and I have another problem. Apparently I'm a problem magnate. Yup. What's that you ask? Ha! Well, it came to my attention a couple of hours ago that just about everyone I'm friends with from high school has, has had, or seeming wants to have some sort of catastrophic emotional or mental problem. And quite frankly, I've had enough. I don't care about whether your mom still loves you. I don't care if your boyfriend isn't a good listener. I don't care if your dog won't stop taking a crap on the living room carpet and your dad's one shit away from shoving his scrawny little neck down the garbage disposal. I just DON'T CARE! Enough with this bull shit. Don't you think I've got enough problems of my own to not want to hear about yours at six o'clock in the morning? Get over yourself. YOU ARE NOT THAT IMPORTANT! And neither are your problems.

You know what I'd love? I'd love to meet someone, anyone who actually has a firm, self-confident grip on reality. Is that too much to ask? I just want to know someone who isn't going to add a whole avalanche of personal baggage onto my shoulders every time we hang out, someone who can hold their own in the world. For future reference, if you're not real, fuck off I don't want to meet you. I've got enough to worry about. Is it really that rare to find someone optimistic enough about life to realize that all our problems aren't worth a hill of beans? Seriously, I think I might know 1 maybe 2 people who actually get it, 1 or maybe 2 people that I can talk about anything too and not have to worry about how they're going to react, 1 or 2 people who are emotionally and mentally mature enough to stay cool under pressure and ask for help when needed. I guess what I'm trying to say is that they are the kind of person who realizes that the world doesn't revolve around them and that are open minded enough to try to see things from another point of view and at the same time respect that point of view regardless of whether or not they agree with it. All the rest, fuck 'em. Let me figure my shit out, then let them come talk to me about their mind-warping little issues. But, please guys, one at a fucking time!

Drawing off the last tidbit: Is is cool to have problems all of the sudden? I don't know, but I'd sure like to find out for sure, because I think I epitomize cool in that regard. It's not really that people have problems which annoys me though. No, it's the kinds of problems. I figure that some people just make mountains out of molehills because they ran out of this months supply of problems on the third day. Now if you've got some real problems you want to complain about, or something else that I can relate to, hell yeah, bring it on. It's healthy to vent now and then. Ever catch yourself making up stuff to make your bad shake sound worse? That's the kind of person I'd like to avoid.

I guess what I'm saying all along is all that I want is a little honesty and a little consideration. If you're my best friend then sure I want to try to help even if the problem is small, if anything to get you to relax a little. It's the acquaintances of mine that I don't want heaping their problems in my direction. And if I don't know you... oh you'd better stay the hell away from me with your baseball injuries and dog with a bladder infection, because I don't want to hear it. I don't like you; I don't want to talk to you; and for fuck's sake I don't care about your mom's sore tits.

So, I've decided I'm going to be more honest. If I don't want to hear about it, I'll tell you. If I'm willing to help; I'll try my best. But if you're not real with me, you're just wasting my time.

Predestination: Fact or Fiction

I would now like to tackle a rather heavily contested question. Are our lives predetermined? And, as with most difficult and highly debated questions, there is a simple and even obvious answer. If there are an infinite number of choices in life then predestination cannot exist.

We must ask if there is predestination, who knows about it? That is, if our lives are predetermined, someone or something must by definition hold that information.

Let's take the religious side first. That is, if we are predestined, then someone or something must know the outcome, otherwise we aren't predestined. There are those who say that God (I'm going to overlook this one) is devoid of time and therefore sees all that will happen. I have to contest however that evidence in the Bible proves this otherwise. God does seem surprised by human action quite frequently. You'd figure he'd have seen it from the beginning and not been too crushed when Adam ate the apple...

Anywho... onto (slightly) more logical arguments... "God" created man in "His image" but gave him free will. Does this mean that God does not have free will? Can God choose to be bad? Or is the very definition of bad determined based around what God doesn't do? (Talk about a sweet deal.) Regardless, I do think we have a consensus that man does err, even if made in "God's image". Therefore, it is possible for man to make mistakes in judgement.

Some are going to say that this is true, but God still sees everything, even the errors of man. Alright, if he sees our mistakes then how can he punish us for them if there is nothing that could be done to stop them, as God had already "seen" them? Therefore, if God is allowed to punish man, which I think all religious people will believe, then he is either committing a sin, in punishing someone for something they didn't have any control over doing, or doesn't have the power of predestination. You pick. Then again, God may not exist, so the whole argument would be void. That would be simpler.

I would also like to address that the common justification of God's omnipotence is that God exists extraneous of time. However, let's look at this too. If God is extraneous of time then he cannot have an impact on it, or even realize it exists. Because for to see the progression of time is to be classified by it. What you were doing when Rome burned, what you were thinking when Timmy's dog died, etc. If time exists anywhere, it is possible to judge your actions in accordance with time.

But then again I can make a second argument. Devoid of time, nothing changes. No action can be taken, because if something changes then there will be a time when it was the same and a separate time at which and after which it was changed. So how can God do anything ever if devoid of time?

Now let's move to a purely logical and empirical argument... If there are an infinite number of possible choices at any one time, then, providing that knowledge of predestination doesn't pop out of thin air and must be discovered through clues, then one must be able to learn all infinitely possible choices before understanding which one will be taken for certain. Unfortunately, with an infinite number of possibilities for even the first choice, you will forever be trying to predict the result of the first action and never even make it to the second, never mind the rest. Thus rendering you unable to predetermine life.

Of course we can come back to the same argument again, a time-devoid existence. If you have an infinite amount of time to ponder the infinite number of possibilities, the you will certainly be up to the task right? Wrong! And, for the same reason as God. You cannot accomplish anything, or change anything if you are devoid of time, because the moment something changes or is accomplished, even the smallest of things, you have time and are restricted by the infinite number of choices again.

So then, now that we understand that if there are an infinite number of choices that predestination cannot exist, let's prove that man has an infinite number of choices...

Let's start again with the religious view. Now there is no clear-cut answer to this one. But I think we can infer that if God created us in his image and gave us free will, that he gave us free will to test what we would do with it (that is providing predestination did not exist). Therefore there is no reason why God would then restrict our possible choices. In fact if he did, it would mean that he didn't actually give us free will at all.

Maybe however that even God cannot make an infinite number of choices for us to make because we are bound by time? Wrong, we only have to make one choice and I think it's pretty clear that we don't even weigh all the logical options before deciding many times never mind all possible of an infinite number of options.

The last argument will also work devoid of God. Man can have an infinite number of choices, but it's not necessary for any one man to know all options to make a decision. So we can throw that argument out in both cases.

But back to religion for a second... So it boils down to this: Either God gave you free will and infinite options, didn't give you free will by not giving you infinite numbers of choices, or God is incapable of giving infinite numbers of choices. The first scenario supports my belief. The second then disproves his omnipotence. God cannot be omnipotent if he can't create an infinite number of possibilities because that would mean that there would be a limit to God's knowledge. And if there's a limit to God's knowledge, it is feasible that then God may not be able to know how the universe will turn out. After all, the argument of predestination was created to solve the conflict that God's omnipotence created regarding our lives. (If God is omnipotent doesn't he know everything that has, is, and will ever happen?) With omnipotence out of the picture, then predestination has no reason to exist at all. Which then also answers option number three. If God is not omnipotent, then there is little reason to believe that he can see how the universe turns out. Predestination rests with the belief that God is omnipotent and if God is not omnipotent then God is also not, by definition, able to see everything.


Well, now that we've finished with religion... thankfully... we'll move on to logical reasons why man has infinite choices and thereby predestination cannot exist.

Firstly, if we cannot prove that there is a limit to the number of choices we have at any one time, then we cannot justify there being a limited number of choices to be made.

If there are a finite number of choices then logically at some point somewhere in the world there will come a decision that has only one choice or no choices at all. This is impossible because to have choice you must have at least 2 options by definition of the word choice.

If this is true, that there is a set number of choices to choose from, then there must be something that restricts or designates the number of choices. This is not predestination, as that contends no choices at all. It is also not free will which contends infinite options. But, it would have to be somewhere in between infinite and zero. Anyone who knows anything about numbers should see a problem here. Neither of these "numbers" are numbers at all. They are absolutes and contain no physical value whatsoever. That is, you cannot perceive three times zero worth of something or one sixth infinity worth of something. Therefore, there is no middle ground between "free will" and "predestination" theories. And, because of this, we have proven that there is nothing that designates the number of choices that man has. Thus, choices are either infinite or zero. But as I said, there is no determining factor as to which one will be true, infinite or zero. Therefore, as we are able to comprehend options, there must be at least two options, thereby there must be an infinite number of options.

Now we have proven that man has infinite possible choices, which means that predestination cannot exist at all.

Blank Slate

The future is unwritten and fluid. There is nothing that we are that is concrete. Our jobs, our families, our homes, our friends, our daily activities, none are concrete. Anything can change at any time. And for all of us, we are able to maneuver within our means.

Our means... But do they really exist? Is there really anything that we cannot do if we don't really really want to? Do you really believe that there is something that you can't do if you really try? If you do, you've got larger problems than any I can solve. Good luck.

But beyond this I have a rather more frightening thought. If we choose not to follow a given path, any given path, and decide to do something else, will anyone actually predict how our actions would have changed their lives?

Let me give you an example.

If my parents never met, I would not have been born. Would anyone actually be asking where I am? No. If I never moved to my home city, would my friends ask what happened to me? No. If I had gone to a different college than I did, would my friends and floormates ever wonder about where I was? No.

But let's turn it around again.

If my parents never met, would I be wondering about my birth? If my parents never moved to my home city, would I wonder about how my friends are doing? If I had chosen to go to a different college, would I wonder what my friends were up to?

No, I'd be off living another life, or not even living at all.

Now do you realize that we really have no purpose in life but what we make? It's true. If there is an infinite number of choices, each with it's own consequences and paths, each with its pros and cons, then there is no one set life and if there is no one set life path then no one path is more significant than any other. Therefore, all paths are equally insignificant when not taken and the world when taken. Taking the larger picture however, all paths (those taken and those not), are equally significant and insignificant at different times and in different instances, therefore all paths are either completely significant because of their possibility or completely insignificant for the same reason.

Taking that as true, we must also see that it is not the choice that is important, but the choice itself that is important. Purpose is the choices we make.

Now, let's take our interests out of the equation. Our interests are the determining factor of our choices, therefore without them, we should be able to see if we really have a purpose. Why do you work at the job you're at? Maybe it's because of money, to feed your family perhaps. Or maybe it's because you enjoy what you do. Why do you associate with the people you do? Friendship? Commonalities? Duty? Work? There are always reasons why we do what we do and why we make the choices that we make. But, remove your job, your friends, your family, and the rest of your interests and what's left? Nothing.

Removing your choices, you have no purpose. You are a complete blank slate. Your choices make you who you are. So make the choices you want and remember that life is not set. Predestination does not exist, but I'll get to that next time.