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Showing posts from January, 2007

Unwilling Dystopia

I welcome a time, a far, far off time, where conflict is absent, war has been silenced, and we can move on to more important issues like "What's for dinner?" and "What beats in the heart of a New England sports fan?". I welcome a day when we can realize that our differences in opinion are just that, differences in opinion, and they have, guess what, no tangible value whatsoever. This planet needs a serious gulp of grow up juice. Are we honestly fighting wars over dino fodder? Over who's beliefs are true? Over invisible boundaries? Reality check. They're wrong if their views lead to the desire of killing people who think otherwise. And hold on to your silk collars there gentlemen, you who fight to end fighting are just as wrong if not more. You're in denial. The bloodthirstiness of a man primeval runs through your veins as much as it does those who're trying to kill you. Society cannot justify war. There is no reason to spill blood. And until you ...

Making It Easier Since Early This Morning

I realize that Google's multi-member blog can be confusing simply because they put the names of the authors at the very bottom of the articles. And since I'm always trying to make things easier, I've decided to make everything a bit easier. From now on anything written by me will be in its traditional color . However all posts by Dave or Terr, under the name TheDiscountedMonkeys will be highlighted in blue . Hopefully that clears up any undue difficulties.

Rantings of a Mad Man Part XII (Revised)

Based on personal experience I've come to a conclusion: There is a direct correlation between the attractiveness of the nurse and the discomfort had from bloodwork or an i.v. no bull shitting, I'm serious. Do you have any idea how much money I could make if I had a time machine and a dozen PS3's? Most boring jobs in the world.... The guy that puts the dimples on golf balls. The guy who checks to see if jigsaw puzzles have all the right pieces. Ann Coulter's dietitian. Michael Moore's dietitian. ATM Braille installer. The patent on Viagra has expired. Uh-oh. Mark McGuire didn't into the Hall of Fame. One down, one to go. We're coming for you Barry. Have you seen that new commercial about 3-5 second male enhancement? Yeah, it's called an erection Chief. Your grandparents have had more sex that you. Did you hear about the guy that got arrested for sniffing glue on the highway. He claimed false advertisement. Orgasm clears the sinuses. I've already menti...