Wednesday, June 28, 2006

New Feature

I find that more often than not that older articles are lost upon casual browsers and for this I decided to create the Featured Article section. It can be found at the bottom of the main page, complete with a direct link to the article and a brief word by yours truly.

-FlyFreeForever (Admin)

The Way We Are

Times like this really get me thinking about the direction of our politicians. When is it ever in the best interest of the country to clog our system with pointless, politically motivated Congressional sessions? Yesterday Congress took up the issue of flag burning and whether or not to pass a Constitutional amendment banning it. Doesn't this just show us where their loyalties lie? They are more worried about keeping their jobs this November than they are about our troops overseas or our economy here at home or the continued removal of money used for student loans.

They are hurting our country. They are hurting our country. THEY ARE HURTING OUR COUNTRY. I can't stress it enough. THEY ARE HURTING OUR COUNTRY!

Well, I think that this time it is time to see their actions for what they are. They think that we are stupid. They think that we will be deterred. Try again. Vote them out. That's the solution. Tell our Senators and Representatives that we will not tolerate their political ploys any longer. It's time to get down to business. We have a large number of really impacting issues facing our country. None of which might I add have anything to do with flag burning or same-sex marriage or anything else.
I just find it scary that within the period of two weeks, our Congress has brought up two separate measures to contradict our Constitution. That's what these bills do. Two acts of political propaganda. Two acts of discrimination and bigotry akin to Jim Crow laws of our forefathers. This should be a threat to everyone, can't you see? And it doesn't matter if you believe in same-sex marriage or flag burning or people's rights to either of them. What will stop our Congressmen in the future from trying, politically motivated, to strip you of your rights. What will you say then. The time to act is NOW before the damage is done. This November, vote to protect our rights. Vote to protect your freedoms.

But otherwise, I have an idea for a new proposed amendment. How about a no sex on Sundays amendment. I know that there are groups out there who find sex uncomfortable enough to pass the damn thing. You know, why not, the Church will sure get on the bandwagon. And who wants to defy the Church! Well I will. And I hope to see you there.

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I would like to add one more thing, not wholly unlike the above. Isn't it just great that just as the political season begins, John McCain begins to act Republican again. To get elected of course. Deception never ceases in Washington. If I were our first president, I'd petition to have my name removed from the city. The state is much more beautiful anyways.

Let's vote these two-faced sons of bitches out of office. For our rights. And for the greater good of America.

Friday, June 16, 2006

Debt

What's so wrong with us? We all want to live prosperous lives. Why do we continue to rob our brothers and sisters of their livelihood to temporarily better our own? What comes around goes around. If you do it then others will do it, maybe to you. Then you'll need to do it more or better than everyone else and society then drops into chaos. What is wrong with us. Are we so nearsighted that we cannot see the results of our actions. Or is it that we choose to live for the moment and not for the future. That has to be it, just look at our debt in this country.

Apparently nowadays if you're not in debt then you're not living up to your financial potential, and more so you're not patriotic. You're not supporting your country's amassed debt (a debt because they only saw through the lens showing the sum of all our nearsightedness). Debt makes the rich richer and you poorer. You are increasing the gap here, not Congress, not rich assholes, not inflation, tax fraud, or selective donating. It's you now. You are draining this country of its wealth every time you add to your credit card debt.

It's time we all grow up a bit and realize that to succeed in this world we MUST live within our means. We MUST not define our self-worth on the number of cars we have or the computer power at our disposal. We MUST not look to our neighbors with envy. LIVE WITHIN YOUR MEANS.

If right now there was no debt in the United States we would all have more money. Why? Because if the national debt was ended people would return to the dollar and inflation would reverse. And like it or not economists, we need deflation. Things have become too expensive today, it's true. And I'm not just talking about gas. You name it and I'll prove that it's more expensive now than before the "War on Terrorism" began before we reamassed a large national debt, personages of importance turning to the Euro instead of the dollar because it was more stable.

We need to firm up fiscal security. And we need to do it today. I say to you if you don't know where you next paycheck is going to come from, if you don't know how you are going to feed your children, if you have any debt whatsoever, including a mortgage, including car payments, including college loans: DO NOT BUY ANYTHING OTHER THAN THE NECESSITIES OF LIFE UNTIL IT IS PAID OFF. And don't just pay the minimum. Pay as much as you can each month. And don't stop until it's paid off. Don't buy lottery tickets, go to the movies, out to dinner, wasting gas, or electricity, or oil, or hot water. Don't have cable or internet access. Do not buy movies or music. Do not buy anything that isn't necessary. Buy food. Do not buy clothes unless the ones you have fall off your back. Trends don't matter. You are in debt because of your reckless spending habits. Do not continue them. Finish them now while you're still young so that you can start to save up for your children and for retirement. You can do it. We all can.

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Coming Soon...

Well my internet's been acting up so until it's fixed there won't be anything new here. But it's supposed to be taken care of tomorrow, we'll see about that. I do have a couple ideas in the works. However, until the time comes that my internet is fixed, peace and fly free forever.

Wednesday, June 7, 2006

People (and Things) I Want to Get What's Coming to Them

George W. Bush
For crimes against humanity

Dick Cheney
For being embarrassed of your daughter

Ann Coulter
The least worthy of any New York Times Best Selling fascist bitches.

Robert Blake
We all know what happened

O.J. Simpson
We all KNOW what you did

Jerry Falwell
No one with your credentials should be allowed to influence our youth

Bud Selig
You are a detriment to baseball

Rush Limbaugh
Hypocritical bastard

Tiger Woods
Awh, you're beatable, why don't you go cry

The Rock
You suck at life, get over it

Barry Bonds
You are a detriment to organized sports. Move to Pakistan and put us out of our misery

Chef
You couldn't stand the heat, so you got out of the kitchen

Darth Chef
No, don't ease off him, he's stupid, don't sink to his level

Republicans
All I have to say is, 49-48, democracy has spoken

God
If He smote that many people, I say it's high time to get a little pay back

Katrina victims
They need fucking homes

Pedophile priests
You like sticking your hot rod up little boys asses, then let me ram a hot poker up yours too you disgusting fucking excuse for a human being

Pearl Jam
For support of just causes

Gay marriage
Freedom for all

Peace
A place for me to rest my head

Free time
If time weren't so free, they'd be a hell of a lot more of it

Family Guy
The Simpsons are greater on every level. They are what you could only ever dream to be

Internet Ads
I don't want to visit a dating website, so stop pestering me

Nascar
For allowing a car sponsored by the Church of Scientology to run on the minor circuit

Global Warming non-believers
The extinction of the polar bear, penguin, and arctic fox, and changing weather patterns

Tuesday, June 6, 2006

Internet Jargon and Whatnot

I can't believe I actually used the word "whatnot". Damn, now I hate myself, but let's just keep moving...

You know, I'm getting really sick and tired of internet jargon. LOL, GTG, G2T, L8R, ur, TTYL, TY, ASL, WTF, BF, GF, LMAO, LMFAO, GG, GL, GS, BS, ROTF, ROTFL, ROTFLMAO, ROTFLMFAO and those are just the uppermost tier of them in my view. I especially love the ones that I have to think about for a minute.

In my opinion, if LMFAO explains exactly how you're feeling at the moment then by all means use it, but I don't know how it could, I can't even pronounce that shit. Lem-fowh?

Regardless, if you mean to say ROTFLMFAO, I think that the situation warrants the use of the actual words. I mean this is a once (maybe twice) in your lifetime occurrence! For god's sake say it like you mean it.

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FlyFreeForever: Hey Gus, right now, seriously man, I'm rolling on the floor laughing my fucking ass off! I just hope my ass doesn't go that far, I'm going to need it to take a crap later, if not the contents therein beforehand to take my calculus test. Talk to you later. I have got to go find my ass!

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Hmm, that would be a nice one: TTYLIHGTGFMA. Now I'd even use that one.

Did you ever notice that when these internety pricks start with the LOL crap that they seem to be doing a hell of a lot more laughing than is normal for the average sane person? Four, five, six, seventy times in a conversation! They're laughing every other line, and that other line is yours! You're not that funny! It takes someone with the IQ of that grape flavored popsicle that you found in the back of your freezer in the middle of this past February to limit themselves to only one reaction to everything you say.

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FlyFreeForever: ...and I says to the man. No YOU go fuck yourself!

PretentiousAsshole: LOL!!! LOL1! LMFAO!!!!!!!!

FlyFreeForever: But other than that, my day's really sucked. My great-aunt died this morning in a car accident.

PretentiousAsshole: ROTFLMFAO!!!!

FlyFreeForever: Dude! It's not fucking funny! It took six hours to ID her she was such a mess.

PretentiousAsshole: Haha LOL!

FlyFreeForever: Dude! Go fuck yourself! I sit here and tell you that my great-aunt....

PretentiousAsshole: LOL

FlyFreeFoever: FUCK YOU! I'M LEAVING!

PretentiousAsshole: TTYL

*And so on*

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I've probably said this before, but would someone please give that asshole a fucking thesaurus! Or maybe it's that they're TOO busy with the other twelve people they're "chatting" with that they can pay attention to my dead family member! That's like calling me, setting the phone down on the table and going to watch television, occasionally shouting in acknowlegement. And I know there are people who do that. They're the same fucking person as the internety pretentious asshole! Maybe instead of watching TV they're online in their parents basement with fifty or sixty of their closest friends, listening to you, while folding laundry, finishing their chemistry homework, and listening to the ballgame on the radio or finding the cure to AIDS or cancer. These are the same exact people who also interrupt you while talking on the phone because they have an "incoming call". Hey, fuck them I was here first! It isn't Jesus on the other line, call them back while you're doing your chemistry homework will you!

When it comes right down to it, I don't care if someone uses it every now and then. Casually drop in a TTYL in the middle of a statement, sure at least I know that the conversation is just about over. But you know why these things were developed right? No? It's for those people who think themselves really great for being able to carry on eight or nine fucking conversations at the same time! It's these pretentious assholes, who want to seem to you the onlooker as if they're SO damn important. It's networking! It's what we're all supposed to be doing. Hands across America! Fuck that. The only networking I want to do is at sea. And at least that way, I get to eat too, instead of just bloating up on a false sense of self-worth.

You know what I do when I'm playing a round of 9-Ball with some pretentious internet-jargon-using asshole and they start with the ASL's?

I answer! Oh yeah I do! But then I add a little jargon of my own...

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PrententiousAsshole: Hi

FlyFreeForever: [sigh...] Hey

PrententiousAsshole: ASL?

FlyFreeForever:63, tranny, Burkina Faso

PrententiousAsshole: [silence....]

FlyFreeForever: TKDKS?

PrententiousAsshole: ???

FlyFreeForever: TKDKS? THY? LLO?

PrentetiousAsshole: huh?

FlyFreeForever: LDL? TYDK?

PretentiousAsshole: [...leaves game]

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That shuts them up real quick. OR, they try and be a smart ass and start answering with indiscriminate words like "yeah" or "err, dunno" or "LLO! POTL! YOD?"

But I've got them beat. I never said I speak English! Then the real fun begins. Boy do I love to fuck with pretentious internety assholes. You have no idea! Once in a while, I'm really surprised however, they actually play along, not just stumble along blindly in the dark as the masked axe-wielding maniac draws nearer and nearer to ending their pathetic little lives, but really plays along. When I find one of those glorious assholes, bitter as I am, and equally (if that is possible) cynical, then hell yeah I'm game. You rack; I crack. Let's get the fuck going!

But as we all know, for every wonderfully humorous Anon there's five hundred billion other assholes. I suppose it's such in just about everything. Too bad, I'd really like to meet someone who truly understands my humor. Then the real fun would begin.